Saturday, March 28, 2009
Introducing Casper
He was here on a trial basis but he's passed most of the tests with flying colors. He LOVES the boys, even as wild and crazy excited as they get around him. The cats are scared of him (imagine this lil' bit of fur chasing my brute 10-15 lber boy cats around the house lol). They're tolerating him, though, and I hope that will only get better. The final hurdle for me is house training him. I'd say he's nearly papertrained now and as he gets bigger we'll take him outside to go.
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Proud. Oh So Proud.
I don't need to log on to Facebook and answer a lot of questions on their mommy style quiz to learn what mine is. A quick visit to the bathroom and a few bath crayons in this house is more than revealing enough! My mommy style is...
The BEAST!
The BEAST!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
The End In Sight (Finally!)
I'm sorry that I didn't update Friday after court. Friday night was spent half in shock and in over the top relief. Yesterday was spent in the throes of agony, along with Cory, as the two of us battled either a stomach virus or food poisoning. We're fine today.
So as you might have guessed from the title and the sentence above....it's nearly over! Yesterday didn't go as I expected at all! I arrived at the courthouse to find out that the witnessess were going to be sequestered (according to the cw.) What she meant was that each witness would testify alone in the courtroom with only the lawyers and parents present. This was for the comfort of one particular witness but if they do it for one I guess they have to do it for all. (Side note here-I'd have liked the courtesy of that when they were ripping me apart.) I got a chance to talk the witness for a few minutes and I heard some some cute, funny stories about the boys. I also heard a few more details about their past that I'd rather not have known. I also know that she was the one that initially turned the parents in, as well as the turning point in the case. When they saw her they knew it was over.
Seeing her there and knowing the "iron clad" case the county had (as I heard later in the words of the GAL), the parents decided to voluntarily terminate their rights. I was sitting in the conference room having assumed the hearing started and all of a sudden in walks the 2 cws present and their supervisor, the GAL, the county lawyer, and the parents' lawyer. I had no idea what was happening and about went into a panic attack until I found out they were there to discuss the terms the parents were requesting in order to voluntarily terminate their rights. They wanted a visit on L's birthday (coming up very soon) and updates with pictures. It won't be a goodbye vist per se because we decided not to tell the boys until the 30 day revocation period is up in case they change their mind. It would still happen, it'll just take longer and it would be better not to have to explain that to the boys. I of course had no problem with any of those terms. It was nearly 11:00 when we finally actually went into the courtroom, as opposed to 8:30 when the hearing was supposed to begin. It's done, though. We wait the 30 day revocation period and it's finally over. I hope that the boys can now actually work on HEALING as opposed to just constantly worrying about the future and being safe.
I actually spoke to the parents. It was hard to see them crying. I really don't doubt that it was difficult for them to do but I fully admit my empathy was hampered by knowing what I know about what they've done to J and L. They asked me to take good care of the boys and I promised I would. In the process of our conversation I did find out a few things that L told them on visits that weren't true that would have made ME mad if I were in their shoes. One example would be that they've sent pictures of themselves at various points for the boys to have and apparently L told them I threw them all out. I didn't...the boys have a copy of every picture ever sent in their lifebooks and I have the originals put up in my room for safe keeping. I personally think L said that as a safer way to express HIS negative feelings towards them. He wanted to hurt them but was too afraid to do it more directly, if that makes sense.
I also actually had a nice conversation with my archnemesis in the case lol. Bruce, who supervised visits, and I have been at odds for most of this case. Given his version of events I still think he should've done several things differently, but I'm glad we managed to end things on a good note.
It's almost over. Finally. 2 years and a month in and we can finally see the light of safety and a future for my boys!
So as you might have guessed from the title and the sentence above....it's nearly over! Yesterday didn't go as I expected at all! I arrived at the courthouse to find out that the witnessess were going to be sequestered (according to the cw.) What she meant was that each witness would testify alone in the courtroom with only the lawyers and parents present. This was for the comfort of one particular witness but if they do it for one I guess they have to do it for all. (Side note here-I'd have liked the courtesy of that when they were ripping me apart.) I got a chance to talk the witness for a few minutes and I heard some some cute, funny stories about the boys. I also heard a few more details about their past that I'd rather not have known. I also know that she was the one that initially turned the parents in, as well as the turning point in the case. When they saw her they knew it was over.
Seeing her there and knowing the "iron clad" case the county had (as I heard later in the words of the GAL), the parents decided to voluntarily terminate their rights. I was sitting in the conference room having assumed the hearing started and all of a sudden in walks the 2 cws present and their supervisor, the GAL, the county lawyer, and the parents' lawyer. I had no idea what was happening and about went into a panic attack until I found out they were there to discuss the terms the parents were requesting in order to voluntarily terminate their rights. They wanted a visit on L's birthday (coming up very soon) and updates with pictures. It won't be a goodbye vist per se because we decided not to tell the boys until the 30 day revocation period is up in case they change their mind. It would still happen, it'll just take longer and it would be better not to have to explain that to the boys. I of course had no problem with any of those terms. It was nearly 11:00 when we finally actually went into the courtroom, as opposed to 8:30 when the hearing was supposed to begin. It's done, though. We wait the 30 day revocation period and it's finally over. I hope that the boys can now actually work on HEALING as opposed to just constantly worrying about the future and being safe.
I actually spoke to the parents. It was hard to see them crying. I really don't doubt that it was difficult for them to do but I fully admit my empathy was hampered by knowing what I know about what they've done to J and L. They asked me to take good care of the boys and I promised I would. In the process of our conversation I did find out a few things that L told them on visits that weren't true that would have made ME mad if I were in their shoes. One example would be that they've sent pictures of themselves at various points for the boys to have and apparently L told them I threw them all out. I didn't...the boys have a copy of every picture ever sent in their lifebooks and I have the originals put up in my room for safe keeping. I personally think L said that as a safer way to express HIS negative feelings towards them. He wanted to hurt them but was too afraid to do it more directly, if that makes sense.
I also actually had a nice conversation with my archnemesis in the case lol. Bruce, who supervised visits, and I have been at odds for most of this case. Given his version of events I still think he should've done several things differently, but I'm glad we managed to end things on a good note.
It's almost over. Finally. 2 years and a month in and we can finally see the light of safety and a future for my boys!
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Pinch Me...I'm Not Irish
This morning at our house....
Scene 1- J enters the kitchen in green shorts.
Me: "You can't wear shorts! It's not THAT warm."
J: "I don't have anything else green."
Me: "Yeah you do. Go find it." (At this point I suggested no less than 3 green articles of clothing he might chose from.)
J retires to his bedroom to change.
Scene 2~ J re-enters the kitchen, stomping his feet and unchanged.
J: "You're ruining my life, mom! I need to wear these shorts!"
Me: "What's wrong with wearing something else green?"
J (whining): "I DON'T have anything else with green on it." (Trust me here. He does.)
Cory: "J, you don't want to wear green anyway. Then the girls can't pinch you."
J considers this, a smile spreads across his joyous face. He retires to his bedroom to don a pair of jeans and a red dress shirt.
Scene 3- J gets in the car as I pick him up after school.
Me: "Hey, bub. How was your day?"
J (huge smile lighting up his face) : "The best!!! The girls were pinching me all day!"
Hmmm. I don't know if I should thank Cory for stopping a tantrum in it's tracks or kick his heinie for starting J on this track already lol.
Happy St. Patrick's Day! May ya have all the pinches ya like from your favorite Lil' Leprechaun!
Scene 1- J enters the kitchen in green shorts.
Me: "You can't wear shorts! It's not THAT warm."
J: "I don't have anything else green."
Me: "Yeah you do. Go find it." (At this point I suggested no less than 3 green articles of clothing he might chose from.)
J retires to his bedroom to change.
Scene 2~ J re-enters the kitchen, stomping his feet and unchanged.
J: "You're ruining my life, mom! I need to wear these shorts!"
Me: "What's wrong with wearing something else green?"
J (whining): "I DON'T have anything else with green on it." (Trust me here. He does.)
Cory: "J, you don't want to wear green anyway. Then the girls can't pinch you."
J considers this, a smile spreads across his joyous face. He retires to his bedroom to don a pair of jeans and a red dress shirt.
Scene 3- J gets in the car as I pick him up after school.
Me: "Hey, bub. How was your day?"
J (huge smile lighting up his face) : "The best!!! The girls were pinching me all day!"
Hmmm. I don't know if I should thank Cory for stopping a tantrum in it's tracks or kick his heinie for starting J on this track already lol.
Happy St. Patrick's Day! May ya have all the pinches ya like from your favorite Lil' Leprechaun!
Friday, March 13, 2009
One Week
The court hearing is one week from today. One week. It happens to be on vist day so there won't be one next week (at least that's what the caseworker says for now). I suppose that could change but I don't expect it to. That means there's a good chance that today was the last visit with the exception of a goodbye vist or two. Waiting is hard enough but the caseworker recently informed me that the judge might not decide that day, he may take some time to deliberate. In fact I got the impression at least that she EXPECTS him to. I'm tired. And done. I just want this to be over. How do people do this?
Monday, March 2, 2009
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