Cutie Patooties

I just had to share! I guess NaNoBloMo got my posting juices flowing lol. Hmmm. Not actually. I have a few posts kicking around in drafts or in my head but it'll be a few days most likely til I get to them now that November is over. I hope to post more than I used to, though.

PS~I was able to add in a background on the boys' school pics. Check it out!

You Might Be a Redneck If...

Your children have the Monday and Tuesday following Thanksgiving off from school for Deer Hunting days (the beginning of deer hunting season).

Happy Hunting! And my freezer has lots of room. Ya know, if you get lucky. Just sayin' ;)

The Gift

Many times in the adoption world the word gift is used. I've read that many adoptees and mothers of loss don't like this term in reference to adoption. I think they feel the word gift objectifies and devalues the adoptee and the pain both feel. I can understand that to a point but I think most adoptive parents don’t mean it that way. It comes down to a situation that causes emotions for all involved that are so very hard to put into words.

Let me try to explain to you what I mean when I say my boys are gifts. I think they are gifts of God given first to their other parents then to me through them. (That part is the same for me even though I adopted through foster care.) When most adoptive parents say they’ve been given a gift I don’t think they mean to imply that the baby is an object with a limited, though great, value. I think it’s more that we’ve been given what we wanted most in life, the chance to be a mother (or father). And you can’t put a price on that. In my opinion the word gift doesn't even begin to cover what that means but I can't think of a better one.

And here's where I get a little mad and insulted. Most “adopters” (ugh, I hate that word) appreciate that "gift" AT LEAST as much as any mom who gave birth. In general most people I think would agree that the more you go through to get something so important to you, the greater the appreciation you have for it. We went through as much, though in a totally different way, as those who gave birth. Let's be realistic. If we were talking about a posession instead of a child there wouldn’t be too many arguing over that. For example two men want Jags. One comes from a rich family and daddy buys it for him. The other works and saves most of his life and finally can afford to buy the car of his dreams. Who do you think appreciates the car more? And NO! I AM NOT CALLING A BABY A POSSESSION! Neither am I implying that it's about money. The exact opposite is actually my point. It's about the time, work, and emotion invested in the process. Because it IS a baby the emotions are infinitetly more intense and prevent the people involved from seeing this. Still, I dare say most of those moms who gave birth to their children feel that they are blessings or gifts too. They don't get taken to task for that. So it seems to me that mothers of loss and adoptees are implying that that blessing or gift has less meaning to us or that we deserve it less. Granted I’m assuming a little here but I don’t think it’s that much of a stretch. I’d be interested in responses from them, especially to set me straight if I’m wrong on either count. I don’t think that I was ”entitled” to any one woman’s child BUT I do think I deserved to be a mother. I never wanted my children at the cost of another woman’s pain but the fact is that SOME people DON’T deserve to be parents. Some of those people have kids anyway and those kids need homes. Are we worth so much less that we shouldn't be allowed to appreciate our children and our parenthood? Are our children not entitled to be treasured that way?

50 things About Lil Ole Me

50 things about Lil Ole Me

Found this on another blog. Lot of the questions are fun and/or different than the post I did for my 100th so I thought I'd do it.

1. What do you add to your coffee? Cream, sometimes flavored.

2. What are you reading now? I'm soon going to start Book 11 in the Wheel of Time series.

3. Do you own a gun? No.

4. Are you registered to vote? Yes.

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? Only before the gyn appointment.

6. What do you think of hot dogs? They're ok for a quick fix. I like them best grilled.

7. Favorite Christmas Song? "O Holy Night."

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Coffee

9. Can you do push ups? Yup

10. What was the name of your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Jim

11. What’s your favorite piece of jewelry? a little girl's ring my Grandma gave me. I don't wear much but I have that on a chain and a couple of other necklaces I wear. I also have some pins I wear when teaching.

12. Favorite hobby? Reading if I have to pick only one.

13. Do you work with people who idolize you? Um, NO!

14. Do you have ADD? Probably lol.

15. What’s one trait that you hate about yourself? I get tense and impatient when stressed and the boys know it.

16. What’s your Middle name? Jean

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment. I'm cold, I'm hungry, and feeling better than when I wrote my last post.

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday. Nothing. We didn't even go to a store.

19. Name 3 beverages you regularly drink. Water, coffee, and iced tea.

20. Current worry right now? Money.

21. What size do you wear? I don't think so lol.

22. Favorite place to be? Home.

23. How did you bring in the New Year? Ate great food and watched movies with the boys.

24. Where would you like to go? Disney?

25. Name three people who will complete this. Not a clue.

26. Whose answers do you want to read the most? Anyone who feels like answering it.

27. What color shirt are you wearing? Green.

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? NO!!!

29. Can you whistle? Yes

30. Favorite color(s)? Green

31. Could you be a pirate? UM...no. Seriously? LOL.

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? I don't sing in the shower.

33. Favorite girls name? Emily Renee currently.

34. Favorite boy’s name? Connor Matthew.

35. What’s in your pocket right now? Nuthin'.

36. Last thing that made you laugh? Cory.

37. Best bed sheets as a child? Pink with flowers when I was real little, tan stripes when older.

38. Worst injury you’ve ever had? I guess I'd have to say dislocating my knees. Yes, as in BOTH of them. Not at the same time thank God.

39. Do you love where you live? Yes, mostly. I love our town, I love the location of our home. I feel like it's pretty cozy in the emotional "vibe" it gives off. It needs a lot of work structurally, though.

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 3- one in the living room, one in the playroom, and one in my bedroom (no cable to that one...I only watch dvds on it.)

41. Who is your loudest friend? Love ya, Renee! LOL.

42. How many dogs do you have? One, Casper.

43. Does anyone have a crush on you? Not that I know of.

44. What are the most fun things you ever did? Before mommyhood I'd say some concerts I went to in college. After mommyhood I'd say the vacation with the boys last year.

45. What are your favorite books? Specifically the Harry Potter and Twilght series. I also like mysteries, especially funny ones like the Stephanie Plum, Kinsey Milhone, Spellman family, and the Cat Who... series.

46. What is your favorite candy? Anything chocolate.

47. Favorite Team? the Philadephia Eagles.

48. What songs do you want played at your funeral? Never thought about it. Not sad ones, though. Maybe each of the boys could pick one song that represents what I meant to them.

49. What were you doing at 12 AM? Watching tv and nearly falling asleep on the couch.

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Holy cow! It's almost 8am. Either the boys slept late or I was so deep asleep I didn't here them!

Feel free to do this if you want! I'd love to see people's answers.

Off

The last few days I've been a little "off." I'm not quite sure why, though I know that money issues and a missing atm/credit card are probably at least part of it. Maybe it's just that with the boys home more due to Thanksgiving vacation I'm having trouble finding time to pray and work out my problems with Him.

Whatever it is I do know how blessed I am. With the exception of finances (and basics are met so I shouldn't complain) things are going really well right now. Jay has had very little in the way of behaviors lately. For a week now there's been nothing but typical kid misbehavior, and extremely little of that. I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop to a point but mainly just working hard to enjoy it while I can. I know there'll likely be backsliding but I am really hoping we're making true progress all the same.

Oh well. Nothing much to do except make sure I get some time with God and maybe a little more sleep. This too shall pass and before I know it I'll be back "on."

Happy Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! We had a great dinner with my parents; my brother and his gf; and my sister, her dh, and fd.

May you all have as much to be thankful for as I do!

Blast from the Past

Here's one of my first pictures of Ty and Cory from back in 04. Ty was 6, Cory 9. They sure have grown up a lot!